As Kim’s 29th birthday approached, she was looking forward to a simple, cozy party surrounded by her closest friends and family. Tom, her husband, took the reins on planning, insisting everything was under control and the night would be special. One thing he delegated, however, was the cake. He had decided to let his mother, Linda, take care of it.
On the evening of the party, everything seemed perfect. There was laughter, wine, and warm conversation filling the room. Even Linda, who often irritated Kim, was bearable tonight, despite her usual over-the-top outfit. Kim had invited Rob, a friendly coworker known for his kindness and his ability to take care of everyone at work.
Kim secretly hoped Rob and Linda might hit it off, thinking it might give Linda something else to focus on instead of meddling in her and Tom’s marriage.
To Kim’s delight, Rob was as charming as ever. He had Linda laughing, and for a brief moment, Kim believed her plan might actually work. Linda appeared genuinely interested, and Kim thought, Finally, maybe she’ll have something else to occupy her time.
But that moment didn’t last long.
Suddenly, Linda clapped her hands with excitement. “Time for cake!” she announced, practically bouncing into the kitchen. Rob shot her a playful wink, making Kim’s heart skip a beat. Maybe this night wouldn’t end badly after all. Tom chimed in, grinning as he explained, “Mom made a cake for you. It’s inspired by your love for gardening, a succulent theme.”
When Linda returned from the kitchen, she was carrying a large, beautifully decorated cake. At first glance, everything looked perfect. But then Kim saw the candles—29 of them, flickering brightly—and her eyes dropped to the message written on the cake.
Her heart sank.
The cake read: “One Year Before You’re Expired.”
A heavy silence filled the room. Guests exchanged awkward glances, unsure of what to say. Kim stood frozen, her earlier joy fading into a cold pit of shock. She felt a wave of nausea rising as she stared at the cake.
Meanwhile, Linda beamed, clearly proud of her so-called joke. Kim’s friend Erica was so startled, she knocked over her wine glass, spilling it across the table, but Kim didn’t even notice.
Tom looked just as shocked, his face turning red as he tried to find the right words. “I didn’t know she was going to do this,” he mumbled, shaking his head. Linda, however, seemed completely oblivious to the tension in the room. “Oh, come on! It’s just a joke. Men always prefer younger women anyway,” she said with a smirk, glancing at Tom in a way that made Kim’s blood boil.
Kim clenched her fists, fighting the urge to throw the cake right at Linda. Tom, his embarrassment clear, finally stammered, “This isn’t funny. You’ve gone too far.” But Linda just waved him off, saying, “You all need to lighten up!”
Rob, who had been quietly observing, stepped forward. He spoke calmly but firmly. “Linda, I thought we were getting along, but if you really believe women expire at 30, maybe I should be looking for someone younger too.”
The room went even quieter. Linda’s smile froze. For the first time that night, she was at a loss for words. Rob turned to Kim, offering her a kind smile. “Happy birthday, Kim,” he said softly, before heading out the door.
Linda’s confidence crumbled. She tried to brush off the comment, but the damage was done. The atmosphere had completely changed. Tom, no longer willing to stay silent, turned to his mom and said, “You’ve crossed a line, and it’s not okay.”
Linda tried to laugh it off again, but this time, no one was laughing with her. Tom didn’t back down, telling her, “Enough is enough.”
Linda’s shock was clear. She wasn’t used to being scolded, especially by her own son, and certainly not in front of an audience. Her jaw dropped, but the usual excuses didn’t work this time. Realizing she was beaten, Linda retreated to a quiet corner of the room, her earlier energy gone.
The party limped on after that. Erica quietly mopped up the spilled wine, and someone turned the music back on, but the mood had shifted. Linda sulked, sipping her wine and avoiding eye contact with anyone, the earlier excitement draining out of her.
Later, when the guests had finally left, Tom wrapped his arms around Kim, pulling her close. “I’m sorry. She won’t be involved anymore. I promise,” he whispered. Kim, who had heard similar promises in the past, wanted to believe him. This time, though, something felt different. Maybe he really meant it.
That was the last time Linda had any say in Kim’s birthday plans. Kim considered getting Linda a cake for her next birthday—a tombstone made of marzipan, as a fitting reminder of how her humor had backfired.
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