Do you think you have crazy relatives? Well, let me tell you about mine, and you might change your mind.
My sister-in-law, Candice, always thought she was entitled to whatever she wanted. She had thrown tantrums over the pettiest things before, but nothing could have prepared me for her most ridiculous demand yet—she wanted me to have a baby just so she could keep it as a gift. When she refused to take no for an answer, I decided it was time to teach her a lesson she would never forget.
My husband, Harry, and I had been together for nearly fifteen years and married for seven. We had two wonderful children, Maya and Luke. Our little family was my whole world. But when it came to extended family, things weren’t as simple.
From the first day I met my mother-in-law, Charlotte, and my sister-in-law, Candice, I knew something was off. At first, I thought maybe I was just nervous about meeting my future in-laws. But as time went on, it became painfully clear—they thrived on drama and selfishness.
Before our wedding, Candice threw a fit because I chose someone else as my maid of honor. She even had the audacity to complain that my wedding dress was prettier than hers. As if my wedding was supposed to revolve around her! She nearly ruined the entire day, but thankfully, Harry’s grandmother, Grace, stepped in. Grace was the only truly kind soul in that family, aside from my husband. Unfortunately, she lived too far away to rescue us often.
But just before Candice’s thirtieth birthday, something happened that made me question reality itself.
Candice rarely visited us. When she did, she avoided the kids, constantly complaining they were “too noisy” or “gave her headaches.” But that day was different. She spent hours playing with Maya, something about it sending chills down my spine. And as it turned out, my instincts were right.
During dinner, Candice kept glancing at me and Harry. She wanted attention, but I had no idea why.
Finally, she clinked her glass. “I have an announcement!” she said dramatically, pausing for effect. “I’m going to be a mom!”
Harry choked on his food. I froze with my fork halfway to my mouth.
“What?” I asked, staring at her.
Harry wiped his mouth. “Who… is the father? You’re not even dating anyone.”
He was right. Her last boyfriend had bolted after she screamed at him in public for not buying her an expensive handbag.
Candice waved a hand. “That’s actually why I came over today.” She straightened in her chair. “The parents of my daughter will be you two.”
My stomach twisted. “What?!”
She sighed like I was the crazy one. “I’m almost thirty, and I don’t have a husband.” She smiled. “The perfect birthday gift would be a daughter.”
I opened my mouth, then closed it. My brain struggled to process her words.
Harry rubbed his temples. “You want Stephanie to be your surrogate?”
Candice shook her head. “No, I want you two to have a baby for me.”
I placed my hands on the table. “So, it would be our child, and you expect us to give it to you?”
“Not just give—give it to me for my birthday. What’s the problem?” she asked casually, like she was asking for a sweater.
I stared at her. “You seriously don’t see a problem?” My voice rose. “Harry and I aren’t having any more children. I am not having a baby just to hand it over to you.”
Candice scoffed. “Stephanie, you’ve always been so selfish.”
Harry’s chair scraped against the floor as he sat up. “No, Candice. Stephanie is right. We’re not doing this.”
“But why? You already have two! What’s the big deal about having one more?” Her voice hit a high-pitched whine.
“I am not an incubator! A child is not an object! A child is a person!” I snapped.
“You just don’t want me to be happy!” she shrieked. “You want to be the only one with kids!”
Harry slammed his hand on the table. “Enough! Leave. Now.”
Candice’s face burned red. She stood, shaking with anger. “I’ll tell Mom about this!” she screeched before storming out, slamming the door behind her.
I exhaled. “How did she even come up with this?”
Harry shook his head. “She’s completely lost it.”
I thought that was the end of it. I should have known better.
A week later, Candice showed up at our house, dragging Charlotte along. She carried bags overflowing with baby clothes, bottles, and blankets. My first thought was that she had decided to be a good aunt and bring gifts for Maya and Luke. But the smug look on her face told me otherwise.
Charlotte walked in without waiting for an invitation and sat on the couch. “Candice told me you agreed to give her a baby,” she said matter-of-factly.
I laughed. “We absolutely did not.”
“Why not?” Charlotte asked, her eyes narrowing.
“Because it’s insane,” Harry replied bluntly.
Charlotte crossed her arms. “Stephanie, as a woman, you should understand that Candice is running out of time. She’s almost thirty.”
“That’s not my problem,” I said firmly. “I will not have a baby for her.”
“But I already bought everything!” Candice whined, pulling out pink dresses and tiny shoes.
Harry buried his face in his hands. “Candice, you are not ready to be a mother. And asking someone to have a child for you is completely insane.”
While they argued, I noticed Charlotte had disappeared. I found her in our bedroom—poking holes in our condoms.
“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” I screamed.
“Making everyone’s life easier,” she said calmly.
“You’re treating us like breeding stock!” I yelled.
That’s when I had an idea. A way to teach them a lesson they’d never forget.
“You know what? Fine. We’ll do it,” I said sweetly.
Charlotte beamed. “Finally!”
For nine months, I played my role well. I faked pregnancy, acted excited, and let Candice plan the nursery.
On Candice’s birthday, the entire family gathered for the “big reveal.” Harry and I walked in carrying a baby carrier wrapped with a giant bow.
Candice squealed and reached inside.
Then she screamed.
“WHAT IS THIS?!”
She pulled out a doll.
Harry and I burst into laughter. “The only baby you’re fit to take care of,” I said smugly.
Candice’s face turned purple. “BUT YOU WERE PREGNANT!”
“Fake belly,” I shrugged. “Happy birthday!”
Charlotte gasped in horror, but Grace burst out laughing. “Serves you both right!”
And just like that, Candice learned the hard way—some things just aren’t gifts to be given away.
